As a problem-solver by nature and as a professional troubleshooter, I’ve tried to get into the habit of asking before doling out advice, even though it goes against my natural tendency. Over the years I’ve attempted to train myself to ask first if someone actually wants help solving an issue, or instead, would they prefer an empathetic listening ear?

That said, fair warning, I am about to offer some unsolicited advice, and it’s the following:

If you can at all avoid getting your tonsils removed as an adult, I would suggest doing so.

I will leave out all the gory details, but suffice it to say that having a tonsillectomy later in life is not particularly fun, and all the ice cream in the world cannot change that fact.

(I was extremely lucky to have had my wonderful dad come in from out of town to take care of me post-surgery, and I am extremely grateful for the endless refilling of my “ice collar,” batches of mashed potatoes and mamaliga, and countless other essential acts of care he provided. I also had lovely friends and family members checking in on me remotely.)

For your amusement, I’ll just leave you with a roster of several days’ worth of random exchanges I had with my father while I was unable to speak. I would hold my iPad out into his field of vision, sometimes waving to get his attention. You’re seeing my side only, since of course he was able to verbally share his parts of the conversation.

Vicki and I are going to zoom at 1 instead of her coming over here

And she’ll do most of the talking 

The funny thing is I eat this regularly 

Overnight oats - oatmeal, oat milk, yogurt, softened overnight 

On Madison we had Bonavita drip coffeemaker, it was recommended by Cook’s Illustrated as the best do you 

I got a free new drip coffee maker through one of my Facebook groups 

When I have people for brunch 

I found out that the pine wall was put in much later in a renovation 

Something with the word Milk?

Club sandwich from Chez Claudette

Maybe you could find the blue freezie pack with cows on it, somewhere in the freezer 

Could we decide tomorrow?

2 replies on “Advice”

Guess what? It’s not particularly fun even as a kid, KP. I completely hosed down my granddad’s incredibly beautiful buick from the back seat on the way home from the hospital at age 8. Yeah, he was *thrilled*! & I guess I was sick for about a week & a half. So–you have my sympathies. I’m glad you’ve still got your father. I miss my folks. I’ll give you a piece of unsolicited advice of my own. Don’t get Covid. It truly sucketh.

I second your advice against having a tonsillectomy as an adult! I was in my 20s and I must agree, the pain of healing was terrible! So glad you came through it ok and it’s all over for you now, Kathryn!!

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